had a change in my email...
so any one who like to add mi in msn,
my new email will be doucexm@live.com
thing are changing again..
well..
regardless in work or dion or myself..
work, will be very very busy as my manager in on leave from tml..
she is getting married..
hope u have a blessing marriage and life..
i will try hard to cope in work while u are on leave..
alot of thing to do..
promotions, renovation for vivo on 3 may..
and new recruitment and training of new staff..
is tiring to train a new staff and they go as they like..
if u girls seriously cant take retail line, stop fucking waste my time..
preparing for dion skool too..
as i couldnt take any leave in may..
so her skool will starts at june..
no further delay..
dion is ready to start learning..
and i will be on leave on june for her..
manage to spent lil bit of time wit her..
i am off today and had my whole day at home..
doing nth..
frenx are planning for a trip to relax on aug i guess..
will be on leave again..
either on aug or oct..
is been long since i had a trip..
looking forward to it..
but gonna miss dion dearly..
if every possibility that i can bring her wit mi..
i hope to do that..
thinking of it, forgetting him anit difficult for mi..
all i have to do is work and dion..
but when i feel someone by myside being nice to mi without asking for return..
i don reali know what to do..
when he wasnt my world animore, i realize, alot of them are out there caring for mi..
i couldnt say i deserve them..
becos they are all nice guys..
i am a girl wit a baby, to ppl out there, babies are burden..
but to mi, dion is my everything..
u may tell mi, i will love dion like my own becos of u..
but i don trust anione would do that..
i am scare of listening to u all telling mi u all love mi alot and promise to take gd care of mi at this moment..
i am afraid when u 2 are by myside secretly and unconditionally loving mi..
i don think i have the confident to give ani one of u the same like how much u all gave mi..
don ask mi, don force mi either..
i don wanna choose anione and lose a frenx in this situation..
i jus wanna put all my heart into dion growth..
and if i were to meet someone i might love as much as i love him before..
i will move on..
yes, u are right somehow when u tell mi not to be hard on myself..
i am hard on myself becos i have too..
i am sick and i have to continue working..
despite i couldnt take in more stress, i still have to work and work..
i am strong..
but that doesnt mean i don need someone by myside..
i need a guy who is able to love dion..
i need a guy who is able to take it that i don have much time wit him..
i need someone who is able to be there when i don wanna be alone..
i need a guy who is willing to go through thick and tough road wit mi..
i need a guy who love mi but accept mi for who i am..
i need someone who is gonna be my last romance..
i need someone who can teach mi how to feel love again..
and allow mi to learn over again how to love him..
don force mi, becos i will nv gonna pick ani of u two..
since yrs back, u two knew my answer..
and now, i will tell u two the same thing..
i am sry..
and as to dion daddy..
When the passion is gone, when love turns to a game, when there is nth more left to say in between us,
I am sry to say, u are out of my game..
we all change, especially ur heart..
i hate the fact that i am here loving u, and u are there loving someone else..
but there is nth i can do but to let u go..
i moved on, so hope u are doing fine too..
xuemin