blog before i think of what i wanna do..
don reali feel like blogging tonite..
i love to have such a nice day everyday..
i love seeing him laugh and smile..
i love to play tgt as a "family"
i love all three of us jus a attention to all other parents out there..
i love him by our side..
we might be a very happy family..
but becos of being immature and reckless..
and now fighting against my pride and ego..
i couldnt tell him to stay by our side..
useless mi..
for not being able to tell him how i feel..
useless mi for not being able to hug him and tell him i reali love him..
i don like departing wit him..
i don like the time when he send mi and dion to my hse and dion kiss him gdbye and seeing him drove off from above...
i cried today at that time a lil..
jus a lil tear drop..
when will be the next time we go out as a family again..
he is such a sweet guy..
in ppl eye, we are a happy family..
ppl won be able to guess that we are not even married..
becos when we are tgt, he don have to say and i will know...
and i don have to say, he will know..
and dion is happy becos her parents didnt quarrel..
we nv did quarrel in front of her..
nv once she rmb her parent quarrel..
except for that day when both family met and had an argument about sending dion over to his relative place..
i have too, becos i don wanna lose dion too..
but that was the day where we both stop talkin about our feelings..
he held dion hand while driving jus like how he hold mine before..
and he look at us like how i look at them..
the chemistry in us is amazing..
but he don love mi animore..
maybe when we face each other..
we nv once change..
he still as depending on mi as before..
and i am still very independent as before..
and i seriously have to admit..
he love dion too..
he bought dion a burberry dress.
he bought dion a big winnie the pooh lollipop(wit alot of small ones inside)
he spend on dion without even asking for the price..
jus like mi..
he doesnt have time for dion becos he work everyday..
even his off he has to work for his dad..
so what he can do is spend on dion and give dion the best that he can like mi..
suddenly feel that he is starting to understand kinship..
i think he is starting to understand love more..
but he still donnoe how much i love him..
i showed him dion new name today..
and he kept quiet..
i knew he was unhappy..
so i kept the paper..
and send him a msg after i reach home..
told him sry..
btu thx him for agreeing..
he say he wasnt upset..
he is happy to be able to spent time wit princess..
i promise him i will give in to him and compromise more..
i told him i will break the news to his parents about the changing of surname..
this is a lil thing i can do for him i guess..
i reali don wanna see him unhappy or hurt..
sry sweetheart..
i don mean it..
if i have to write a million of sry to u..
i will write a zillion thanks to u..
and i will write a total of the total of both million and zillion of i love u..
we had a crazy day today.. both chasing after dion up and down.. and i am sure..
is all worth it..
xuemin