has been reali lazy to blog..
early in the mornin later, i have my monthly meeting..
and it suck! becos i have to be awake at 7.30am..
and chances of seeing dion awake this early is small..
i miss baby dion alot today..
and him..
thing happening around mi wasnt reali gd this few days..
especially in work..
but i am copin well still..
baby dion is olways my pillar..
when she continuously called out "mama"
when she and mi played kiss kiss..
when she come to mi and ask mi to carry her..
is olways in my best stage of life..
i beat her lil hands 2 days ago..
jus becos she giving temper and very very norti..
keep throwing things and even ignore my words..
i know i shouldnt behave this way..
but baby..
i am sry..
mummy is sry..
i know u are still young enough to know what is right or wrong..
i should have been more patient to u..
i am mad at u but even mad at myself..
i am sry baby princess..
mummy reali love u..
reali sry for hurting ur lil hand..
jus one hit on it..
and i know i am wrong..
sry dion..
every one says, it is obvious i still love him..
has been so many time i given him chances..
and jus one sms from him makes my day..
but a pity is, he doesnt know..
i am tired..
sometime i reali am..
but i know nth i do gonna have him back into my life..
i jus wan him to be happy...
i told mum last few days..
to buy 4D of the date mi and him started out as a gf and bf..
0812..
and today...
mum called mi when workin and say, she didnt buy it today but it was a winning number..
so afterall, it is still fated not to be mine..
if there is reali a god..
give mi some hint that my heart is worth staying there at the past..
i need to know he is worth mi waiting..
becos i am falling down..
very very soon..
xuemin