was in a veri gd mood ystd but today mood swing veri fast.
i have a new to break out today.
i was thinkin how ppl gonna accept mi havin a illness now.
wonder did anione heard of alzheimer diseases?
i onli heard of it 2 days ago.
i am now in the veri mild cognitive decline . which means is now in the earliest stage of this illness.
i am tryin to act normal.
thinks my stm is cause by after preg.
but as i said.
i forget about the past and try hards to think but jus cant thin of anithing.
and veri randomly i will rmb after 1 or 2 days.
and forget again.
jus becos i rmb thing by writing things down.
and jus becos of my living condition and everything i been through.
for the veri worst case will be i may be like a lil kid in future that doesnt even noes how to walk on her on.
i thought i could hide it.
but i think of what my doc said. for the worst of it i may start forgetting ppl.
even my own reflection from mirror.
there is currently no treatment.
doc gave mi to choose to depend on drug on my own will to hang on.
he wanted to call my family but i told him not too.
he say i have alot of thing to avoid ler.
to try to maintain and even recover on my own.
don get into stressful stages that i will have veri bad mood swings and awful tempers.
and try to rest more and go out to hang out wit frenx that i am comfortable wit.
try not to be unhappi. avoid graze from ppl, or even arguments.
i am gonna break this news to everybody is becos i noe alot of ppl love and dote on mi.
i dk how to say.
but i feel this is the most comfortable way ba.
everybody might get a veri big shock out of this.
but don worry about mi.
for dion sake, i will work hard to fight this.
pls don pity mi:)
pls don confront mi and ask mi more ler:)
i am holdin back my tears.
and trying to be real happi.
i don wanna forget all my dearest frenx, my sisters and brother. buddies, and even dion or family members.
i can mostly depend on notes to rmb thing ler.
don worry all rite?
in case i am wit anione outside and i forget thing.
pls do help mi patiently all rite?
xuemin