i am suppose to be slpin at this time!
but i couldnt make myself fall deep aslp.
spended my day at home doin nth but slpin alot.
and met apple, jiahui and yanting.
is a enjoyable evening cos we have quite alot to talk about too.
but reach home not long.
i receive an email from my lawyer.
is makin mi wonder, what i did is rite??
i didnt expect thing to happen so fast either.
as everything had alreadi happened.
i guess, i should give him no more chance.
where he placed my love and trust to him?
chatted wit ys on msn jus now.
i noe he is still in my heart.
i could onli lie to myself, that i don love him.
telling myself i hate him.
askin myself not to be nice to him.
but i guess is all useless.
talk to daddy about movin hse.
and yes, he agreed.
but how big is singapore to make mi run away from him.
how to make myself forget about him wit baby princess is with mi.
lookin at her will make mi rmb him.
apple is rite, i couldnt run away from this fact that afterall i may cry when i look at dion in future.
but i had no choice too rite?
his life doesnt needs mi animore.
even baby is not needed in his life of immaturity.
i reali wanna listen to his parents and foolishly wait till he is mature enough.
wait till he realise who will be wit him despite he were to lose everything in his life.
wait till he falls and nobody is there to help him.
and wait till he get hurts in a r/s and realise how much i did for him.
of course ppl will be thinkin that the onli way for mi now.
in order to maintain a "family" for baby dion.
but how long more i have to wait?
wait till princess grow and go to skool?
did he ever wonder, how much time and chances i gave him.
i cried for nth again!
yes! silly girl.
but i reali reali love him alot.
i don wanna hurt him or dion.
no matter what, dion life is so incomplete without him by our side.
but as what u told mi before.
do what i say.
and no backin out ler.
i had a gathering wit loves.
12hrs away! and i am tired.
baby dion cant slp when i didnt slp.
donnoe why she so norti.
lettin her listen to her fav music.
which make mi damn slpy.
no choice, she is my princess.
tml(1st oct), i am gonna meet her again.
and to noe about my report and her current weight
her new pattern to show mi.
mummy so in love wit u=)
jus like how much i love ur daddy.
u are the one and onli best gift that i had from ur daddy.
i will nv gonna regret choosin u over ur daddy.
cos if i were to choose ur daddy months ago, i won forgive myself.
counting down 65 more days to see dion.
i am hardworkin everyday to take note of the countdown.
and nv will i forget to greet u everyday.
and on behalf of ur daddy.
but i wanna say, i am so tired.
so so tired.
xuemin